Nesting for Baby: Adoption Version
When a pregnant woman begins to nest for her baby she knows there are about 9 months to plan for it all. There is an end date that allows her to properly prepare and plan for her baby. There are Baby showers thrown to help her in her nesting needs. Later, once the gender is discovered she can start incorporating outfits into her nesting process.
When a couple starts the adoption process there is no official end date to make your target. You could be welcoming your baby in the next few days or years depending on your situation. This makes it difficult to plan any showers, know what gender to plan for or when to pack up the diaper bag… oh wait, add diaper bag to the list! :)
So if you are just beginning your own adoption journey and need a guide on where/how to get started in your nesting journey I’m here! Let’s get started
First things first the Shower.
Every family is different some use their fundraising money to help fund the necessary baby items and do a small shower after baby arrives. We are completely set with baby items that we would rather have a Nesting party with a few friends and family (if the time allows) otherwise we are planning on just having a meal train after baby arrives.
We have been slowly gaining and attaining baby things from family and friends over the last few years. Things like high chairs, a stroller, bouncers/saucers/swings, pack and plays, toys, books and play mats. These things are not necessary to gather before you get a call, but our family and friends have been kind and generous throughout our journey that it just makes these bonus items extra appreciated to have.
We also have been fortunate enough to purchase the bigger stuff on our own: a crib, rocking chair, dresser, and car seat to have on standby so that when we get the call we are prepared. Depending on your state/location/agency, you may be required to have certain bigger items in your possession ASAP. Check with your agency/caseworker to make sure you have the bare minimum required to welcome your child home. Ours requires only a pack and play and a car seat.
Now let’s talk Nursery.
We set up our Nursery very early on in our TTC journey! I have a post written back in 2021 all about it HERE it has since evolved, though the color is the same, but I now have a theme WOODLAND. We have accumulated cute little foxes, bears, deer, bunnies etc. With stuffed animals and decor. Again, none of this is necessary to have done before baby arrives, but it gives you something to do while you wait for your bundle of joy. I also view it as a form of self care. Your newborn is not going to care about how nicely you’ve decorated their room, or what color you chose to put on the walls, but this is for you to get excited even if the journey is long.
Prepping the Diaper Bag.
This is a step I would deem more important than Nursery nesting. When you get the call, you may have to do a few hours of driving, you may have to go and pick up your baby ASAP, so having some things packed and ready to go is the smartest thing you will do.
The diaper bag itself: can honestly be any backpack if that is all you have lying around, my mom gifted us one that has a convenient diaper changing station attached. Just make sure it’s a large enough bag to fit the following
Bottles: You just need some 2oz bottles, infants eat in small amounts at first. Wait until you are on your way to pick baby up to grab some formula to avoid expiry. You never know what the hospital will have on hand so it’s best to be overprepared than underprepared.
Diapers: We are starting out with disposable diapers for ease and until the umbilical chord falls off and then to cloth later so we packed those into their bag.
Clothing: We have a couple of gender neutral outfits with a top, pants and shorts as well as onesies, socks, pajamas, sleep sacks, mittens, hats, drool bibs and a long sleeve layer in case of cold weather. We also are prepared for both preemie sizes as well as newborn.
Cleaning Supplies: I found a travel sized bottle cleaning rack and grooming kit, in case we need to wash any bottles or the baby themselves before getting back home.
Parent bag(s): if you and your spouse can fit all of your stuff into one duffel bag that would be best
Clothing: Just a few under garments and extra pants and shirts in case you need to stay a few days and are hours away from home.
Toiletries: travel deodorant, toothbrush and paste etc. This way you can have the essentials packed but can go on using your at home items while waiting.
Reading Material/Journal: Bring your baby books so that while you wait for discharge instructions you can start mentally planning, but also bring something to calm you down a Bible or fun book to read will help (it will also be good for your phone’s battery life ;)) A journal so you can write down what happens, it will all happen so fast you’ll be glad to jot any notes down about that glorious day in the future.
Bonus Bag: we packed one additional duffel bag with the extra baby clothes a bobby pillow and diapers and infant bath towel and washcloths. Again you don’t know what your situation will be, if you’ll be out of town a few days or back home in a few hours.
Additional Items.
Some extra things we’ve got set aside are baby baths, one for the kitchen sink and one that gets inserted into the tub. A Bumbo seat, a toddler tower for later years, pacifiers, an Adoption style baby book, teething toys, diaper pail, extra fitted sheets, and a changing mat.
I also want to encourage you to create a baby registry! We used Babylist and shared our link with our family and friends with a note of “We don’t know when we will meet baby but if you feel so inclined to help us get ready for baby here’s our list.” Your loved ones want to help and want to support your baby and YOU and one way is to get you some things on your list.
Every adoption case is different and requires different planning. We are going through a domestic, in-state, infant adoption. So this list might look different if you are going through international adoption or fostering-to-adopt. I still hope our list helps you to start forming your own list and gets you excited for welcoming your someday baby home!
